In conversation with Rebecca Dragon.
A non-exhaustive guide for the adoptive parents who would otherwise contact me for one-on-one advice.
It felt like I was dying unseen.
When we excuse those we love for offenses that aren’t ours to forgive, we enable greater harm.
I got to a place where I could allow myself to hope and dream of what motherhood could look like for me. Believing it possible was another story.
Identity and our understanding of it isn’t fixed, and all aspects of it matter—even as they change and evolve.
It’s been a strange year and somehow the viral and racial pandemics have got me thinking about robots. I’ve been considering how we use technology for better and worse, the dehumanization of the lower castes, and the parallels of robot fantasy and White supremacy.
Something terrible happened in the adoptee community and we can’t talk about it. The lack of discussion around it is additionally traumatic and familiar.
While it’s impossible to always get along, I want to believe we can live among each other more peacefully—and take appropriate steps when we can’t.
When we don’t work through our trauma, its trapped energy continues to move through us.